Why my blog has been neglected like an unwanted step-cat.

Why my blog has been neglected like an unwanted step-cat. a.k.a. Trouble Cat

So my precious blog, Sunbursts or Marble Halls, has been left alone and unloved. Not on purpose or rather not because I don't think it is lovely but because I have been a "light-avoiding invalid" off and on for the last couple months. Let me elaborate.

I have always been a headache/migraine sufferer but in April they increased from once a month to every day. Not at all pleasant.
There is a level system I have created that I might accurately measure the severity of these attacks. (side note: for an awesome blog post about this, and all around stinkin hilarious blog check this out Hyperbole and a Half. )

So here is my pain scale system
Level 0: What?! There is a level 0. There are times when I could have no headache at all? You lie! Wait I remember it one time, I spent my time cleaning the house, What a waste of a level 0 day!

Level 1: Hmm I don't feel quite right. I know if I were to jump up and down or try Downward Facing Dog i would probably get worse but I am so high functioning right now; I want to do these things! I want to conquer the world and read books.

Level 2: My eyes are starting to get this stingy thing were it feels like someone is poking behind my eye and probably laughing at me. I am still reading books but the pokiness is getting irritating!

Level 3: I am starting to get a little testy, The likelihood of my turning into a monster if I stay up past 9:02 is strong. Matt begins to usher me to bed alone, knowing if he reads with the light on I will suddenly wake up from my sleep and try to eat him. But I am still feel ok in my waking hours.

Level 4: The pokiness in the back of the eye is starting to spread. I can feels its painful tendrils as it latches to important parts of my brain. (Not the dumb part like sense of smell but the bits that control balance, cheerfulness, and tolerance of lights) Slowly all the lights in the house will start to get turned down or off. Bright things seer though to my soul when the tendrils start attacking my skull. This is one of Matt's least favorite levels because he comes home to all the lights off and when he turns them on I hiss like a deep-sea fish that has evolved to be eyeless because it lives at the bottom of the ocean.

Level 5: If I am smart I will start administering some sort of pain-reliver at this juncture. Key words "If I am smart" Because sometimes I want to be all natural and not destroy my kidney and liver functions. I know I can be so lame sometimes. I am all like" I am an Aes Sedai" (like a witch from Harry Potter but awesomer and way more dorky) Who is this headache to control me?! Haha Famous last words.

Level 6: My stubbornness is leaking out my temples making them pound like a marching band. I always find it disconcerting when I can take my pulse from my pounding temples without touching them. At this junction standing upright starts to take an extreme effort and in response my body starts to shut down "unnecessary" functions like talking and thinking.

Level 7: My head is staring to really hurt but seeing as it might be in the middle of the day I can't just go to sleep so I grab some Bengay and spread it on my temples. It is so cold and numbing I could marry it. Then I put on some headphone and listen to something with my eyemask on. Examples 1. Jane Eyre Chapter 27 See my blog post Librivox: Heaven's gift to man 2. New Moon 3. You've got mail 4. Miranda Lambert

Level 8:Things are starting to go down hill really fast now. I am now starting to get nauseous from my untamed affliction. Laying in the fetal position while rocking back and forth seems like a genius idea since I can no longer stand or open my eyes. It's the little things.

Level 9: I am probably close to crying now. I have taken my maximum amount of pills and now I am just waiting for it all to end one way or another. Matt is getting that worried look in his eyes like I might kill him on accident or explode into a pile of migraine juice.

Level 10: I am 100% incapacitated. I tell Matt if I'm not unconscious, dead, or better in 30 mins we are going to the hospital and they are going to pump me with so much drugs I'll start hallucinating that I have finally gotten my own My Little Pony: C.C. Cloppity Cupcake. You'd love her.

Level 11 & up: I am dead.


So as you can see blogging is not something that is feasible in Levels 4 and up. Also cleaning teeth is not very feasible. But today is a good day. Not really. Today was a royally sucky day but I did stop an Level 9 in it's track with my Holy Grail Codeine pill. So here we are.

P.S. I even undated my recently read books section. Yeah me
You're prayers are appreciate. I am seeing a neurologist and I don't have a brain tumor. Win Win.

Sarah's Key

Addendum: an item of additional material, typically omissions, added at the end of a book or other publication.

So after speaking with Sheila, I feel that an addendum is needed for my Sarah's Key comment.
**Spoiler Alert**

"30. Sarah's Key by Tatiana de Rosnay- Donna gave me this book and well... It is something that needs to be remembered (Concentration camps) but I don't appreciate being haunted by the horrific death of a fictional character. And I have fallen out of love with Paris, which is dreadful. May it not last. 12/28/10"

Though I am still haunted by Michael's death, now that time has passed I can see the true merit of the book. She really is a great author and truthfully I would have run away and tried to forget it happened just like Sarah did ( not that she was successful). Dying in a concentration camp is terrible but I'm not sold that dying in a cabinet is better. I just can't detach myself from making the fictional story real.

Synopsis: I am glad I read it. I am glad I went on that journey. I do recommend it to those willing to go down that road.

There.

The Allen Library

Check out our awesome website!!

www.TheAllenLibrary.com

Welcome to the world Darling Mae

Meet my precious baby niece. She is perfect. I ache from my soul to hold her. Isn’t Brittany the most beautiful mother you have ever seen. I’m so proud of her. 9 days can’t come soon enough. I have to remind myself that we’ll have her forever. I can’t believe she is here. Thank you Jesus. And so begins the year of the babies…

January 19th
2:06 pm
6 lbs 11 ounces
19 inches long
Perfect

I do love you, but this must be the last time I say it

Everyone!!! It is here. The preview for the new Jane Eyre movie. It looks amazing (even though I wasn't cast as Jane)
It appears that it will be very accurate. I love that they put my favorite line in the preview.
"Just because I am poor, obscure, plain, and little, does not mean I am so soulless and heartless!"

Librivox.org : Heaven's gift to man

As the blog title suggests Librivox.org just may be the greatest website of all time. It has come to my aid on countless occasions.
What is it?
www.Librivox.org : Acoustical liberation of books in the public domain
Doesn't that sound lovely.
People from all over the world volunteer to narrate books that anyone can download/ listen to online for FREE.
Some of the readers are treasures (Ezwa from Belgium is my favorite) and some are dreadful. I love it so much I've saved it on my phone so I have it when in need, like tonight for instance. (Or actually this morning seeing as it's 3:30 am)
What did I listen to: Jane Eyre Chapter 27 read by Ezwa. That is my favorite chapter. I have listened to her narrate it at least 3 times. For those of you who don't know what happens in that chapter just by the number, Jane has decided to leave Mr. Rodchester because he has a crazy wife in the attic and she will not be his mistress. His sorrow and her strength is so beautiful and tragic to listen to. I have always seen Jane Eyre as a great role model for me and used her example of purity and a standard for myself in my dating years. Not that Matt has a crazy wife ( as far as I know).
So back to why I am posting as early. I have been sick for a couple days and since yesterday I have had a debilitating headache that is not abiding by the rules of the treaty. 1.Letting me sleep it off 2. Admitting defeat with drugs. So when laying on the bathroom floor (the last resort for healing and rest) after taking many pills, I plugged in my headphones and listened to Jane Eyre. What a relief. What a great solace to my pain and suffering. That my words may some day span the generations to comfort some young woman in the depths.
For those of you unfamiliar with Jane Eyre and for those who love to hear that words here are some of my favorite lines from Chapter 27:

**"That I am not Edward Rochester's bride is the least part of my woe," I alleged: "that I have wakened out of most glorious dreams, and found them all void and vain, is a horror I could bear and master; but that I must leave him decidedly, instantly, entirely, is intolerable. I cannot do it."

**"Jane, my little darling (so I will call you, for so you are), you don't know what you are talking about; you misjudge me again: it is not because she is mad I hate her. If you were mad, do you think I should hate you?"

"I do indeed, sir."

"Then you are mistaken, and you know nothing about me, and nothing about the sort of love of which I am capable. Every atom of your flesh is as dear to me as my own: in pain and sickness it would still be dear. Your mind is my treasure, and if it were broken, it would be my treasure still: if you raved, my arms should confine you, and not a strait waistcoat--your grasp, even in fury, would have a charm for me: if you flew at me as wildly as that woman did this morning, I should receive you in an embrace, at least as fond as it would be restrictive. I should not shrink from you with disgust as I did from her: in your quiet moments you should have no watcher and no nurse but me; and I could hang over you with untiring tenderness, though you gave me no smile in return; and never weary of gazing into your eyes, though they had no longer a ray of recognition for me.--

Good Night Readers or Good Morning, I hope sleep will find it's way to me soon.

Want to listen for yourself
http://librivox.org/jane-eyre-by-charlotte-bront/

Meet My Better Half

Hello Family and Loved Ones.
Please meet the newest member of my family and my better half: Emaline



Isn't she the cutest? I am thoroughly enamored. She really is my better half, slightly thinner (and slightly more well-endowed) But we can forgive her that. Because she is just precious. Every time I walk by I have to stop myself from giving her a hug (sometimes I just can't stop myself)
I got her on ebay and named her the moment I knew she was on her way. Matt hates the name Emaline. He say's it's weird and he's never heard it. He asked if I have ever met anyone named Emaline. I say "Not in real life" But hello what about Emaline Harris from Anne of Green Gables. Emmeline March from Thirteenth Tale. It doesn't matter anyways she is mine and mine alone. I can hardly wait to make a dress with her.
It has occurred to me that she must also be much cuter than I am because people are not walking up and hugging me all the time. But I really don't think I would like if they did.
Anyways , now you are up to date and I finally get to use the name Emaline because apparently Matt won't let us name our child that. Hmmph